Ok, the turmoil that was my personal life has ended for the time being. My last relationship had me pushing myself past boundaries that I have never crossed. Emotionally, ethically, physically, I grew. And expanded and found my limits. I don't think I had ever made myself test everything so thoroughly before. It was cathartic, but I'm so relieved it is over. Now, I can approach life and personal relationships in a more healthy manner.
It is amazing to me that I hadn't done this til now. I have a healthy respect for anarchy, but was always timid about embracing it. But the last year had me breaking SO many rules in the pursuit for information and personal expression. I don't think I ever cried so much or allowed others to be hurt by me. I'm normally so careful and considerate of the stronger emotions that can rule a person's life, but last year, I just threw that filter out. I crossed lines, said things that were brutally honest and allowed for personal error in so many ways. And the tests I gave myself, I mostly failed in. But because of all the darkness, it made it so much easier for me to pick out the bright spots in me and in my life. And appreciate more the smaller circle I chose to spend my time in.
And because this post is a bit deep and life would be incomplete without it, I give you random shit.
I am officiating my niece's wedding.
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Watching movies while sitting on the lap of the current beau gives me tingles in my pants.
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I have a keg in my garage just waiting to be tapped.
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I'm excited that my kids are aging faster than they can make new carseat laws, so I don't have to put them in one.
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My friend, Lisa, may be my soulmate of the platonic kind.
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Your mom is random.
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