Tuesday, January 5, 2010

It was the summer of 1992. I am going to be a senior, but at that point, my only goal was to suck every last bit of fun out of the responsibilty-free, hot days. My family and I just finished a week out on Lake Mead. Meaning 6 straight days of being outside in 100+ degree weather. And the tradition was to go to Vegas and sit our sunburned asses down to see a movie. It would be our first time in air conditioning in a week. And made so much colder by our first degree and, in someplaces, second degree burned skin.


Sitting in the dark, picking popcorn out of a bucket with my tongue and slurping on a coke, the title flashes.

UNIVERSAL SOLDIER

Back then, I was in love with Jean-Claude Van Damme. In Bloodsport when he first hops into those splits of death? LORD. So I was pleasantly surprised at this movie. He's such a wooden actor that an emotionless cyborb-like fella is a perfect role!

There is one scene that, to this day, still sticks with me. He is at a diner and discovers food again. And all he wants to do it eat. Eat, eat, eat. And when the locals think he can't apy, they proceed with assault and battery. He vam-dammes the hell out of everyone, while still eating. But something amazing happened at one point in the scene. The herione returns to the cafe hesitantly, since a man had just went thru the front plate galss window. Peeks thru the shattered glass at JCVD and he says, "I just wanted to eat", in this sheepish, slightly confused way.

And my private parts went THROB.

That's right.

Everytime that had happened prior, a boy had been in my personal space. Not this guy. He was on a screen.

I was able to meet JCVD a few years later. It was then I realized we may have been the same height if I was in heels. Yet, doesn't change a thing. It doesn't detract from that moment at all.

Last night, as I am getting ready to watch District 9, there are previews on the DVD. And I am a whore for previews. And then the most amazing thing happens. I see this:





That's right. They are reunited in combat AGAIN.

The DVD comes out 2/2/10. I will totally have to watch it. In the dark. By myself.

2 comments: