This is the message I received Tuesday morning at work:
"Do you notice how many e-mails I send that are titled “stuff”?
Yeah, not much creativity in my titling here. Oh well.
Anyway, I wanted to tell you how awesome you are, and how glad I am to have you as an ex-wife. Really, I’m not saying this sarcastically. I’m really glad that we can all take the kids to do stuff, and that we don’t get all butt hurt when we pick on each other. I feel really lucky to have you in my life. This morning I just felt I should tell you that. I don’t know why, and no, I’m not joining a religion. I just want you to know you are appreciated."
I have the absolute best ex-husband in the world. He is an awesome father to our 2 girls, a loving companion, a valuable addition to society and I can't ever imagine being married to him again. Because married? We sucked.
That whole adage, "Marry your best friend"? Great idea. Because if it ends, you should be able to go back to that friendship with minor adjustments.
We were the bestest of friends, sharing Big Gulps while playing Doom until the wee hours, me offering him grooming advice to make him more attractive to the ladies, him helping me with my car issues.
Fast forward 13 years, and I'm living alone, happiest I've been in a few years, and we are back to being friends, but now with the addition of children. Having that separation has made me a better person and mother. The stress level is down and I can grow unhindered. And it is the same for him. He's been in a relationship for over 3 years now, more grounded and content.
So this holiday season, I am grateful for him and our evolving friendship. He's the best partner I could have ever asked for that I refuse to live with ever again.